Beer Madness! (An ode to ale, college basketball, and day drinking)

You are probably an American or living in America. (If you are not, please click this link.) Since you are an American or have had America thrust upon you, then I am sure you are aware of the big month-long amateur sporting contest that begins this week. This contest is a great opportunity to gamble and to slack off at work while doing research* for your impending gambling binge. The great thing about this implicit endorsement of wagering on the physical performance of 19-year-old boys, is that everyone can participate and anyone can win.

Your college is not represented? Fill out your bracket predicting the 1^st round demise of your hated rival. You don’t know the difference between a box-in-one and a box of shit? Fill out your bracket based on which mascot would win in a fight. You know more about college basketball than Dick Vitale and Bill Raftery? I guarantee your bracket will not win. Karen from accounting is going to win because she likes Kansas State’s purple uniforms.

In honor of this great gambling orgy, J Street Beer is doing you a favor. We have combined your two favorite things into one great thing. Alcohol and gambling. Together at last! That’s correct, we are hosting our inaugural J Street Beer Madness Super-Brew Tournament For The Ages (JSBMSBTFTA, for short). Over the next few weeks we will whittle our 64 brews down to one supreme beer champion. View the bracket below and then vote on the individual match-ups. The voting will be for a complete 24 hour period and each match-up will coincidentally be voted on during the same day as the corresponding match-up in that other tournament that everybody in your office will predict better than you. When we get to the excellent eight final beers, J Street Beer will have head-to-head taste tests to determine the winner.

On to the match ups…

First up, the East Region (no, it has nothing to do with where these beers came from).

This region has many of your lighter beers, but don’t sleep on them. There are a few strong candidates to sneak into the finals. Watch out for Dogfish 60 Minute in the 4 spot, and Raging Bitch hiding at number 7. Upset alert: Loose Cannon at 11 overtaking Yuengling at 6.

Up next, the West Region!

This region is shaping up to be the powerhouse of the tournament. Holding favorites like Kona Pipeline Porter, Founders Breakfast Stout, Stone Arrogant Bastard, and, of course, Bell’s Hopslam; this region may have the favorite to win it all. Intriguing matchup: Bell’s Hopslam and Flying Dog Gonzo. That’s going to be a fight to the finish.

Southwest Region.

Holding on to many of our summertime favorites, this region will brighten your day. But don’t be surprised if our tournament winner sneaks out of here. Tasty favorites like Ommegang Abbey, Weihanstephan Hefeweizen, and Founders Dirty Bastard could easily upset anyone. Insider information: don’t put your hopes on Natural Light.

Last, but not least, the Southeast Region.

Many of your stronger darker beers are lurking in this region. They are likely the toughest of the bunch. Big and powerful, but lacking in finesse. Don’t be surprised if a high ABV contender shows up in the finals from here.

Disclaimer: Seedings are fairly random and will obviously not make sense to you. This is okay. Take a deep breath. Also, beer that were chosen are ones that you should be able to go out and purchase on your own in a decent beer store or bar. This is so you can make a very educated decision about who to vote for… or something like that.

We also have a fancy Excel spreadsheet that you can download and fill out. Seriously, it has drop-down menus, and auto-creates a printable sheet for you. It’s a modern marvel. Download it here.

Voting starts tomorrow and coincides with the starts of those NCAA games that are going on. So, check back tomorrow!